Here is a funny and current story. I am stuck in a bath. I can't actually get out of my bath tub. Why? I've go a chest infection and some fever so I'm home sick. I also can't turn my head. Took some antibiotics and a Valium and thought- i will have a relaxing bath. I found some bath salts. Lit some candles and poured in some coconut oil- now I am realising it was too much coconut oil. Went to get out after pulling the plug and I just slide around like a giant greased up potato in a roasting dish. There is no traction. No grip. Just me and my fat body slipping around covered in oil. Fuck home beauty remedies. SOS
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